cold and chaude 冷与热

 cold and  chaude

A patron in Montreal cafe turned on a tap in the washroom and got scalded. “This is an outrage,” he complained. “The faucet marked C gave me boiling water.””But, Monsieur, C stands for chaude – French for hot. You should know that if you live in Montreal.””Wait a minute,” roared the patron. “The other tap is also marked C.””Of course,” said the manager, “It stands for cold. After all, Montreal is a bilingual city.”




Traveling salesmen make their living visiting as many customers as possible. So speeding to get from one appointment to the next is not unheard-of. Which is how I got pulled over by a highway patrolman. “Don‘t you ever look at the speedometer?” the officer scolded. Before I knew it, the truth spilled from my mouth. “As fast as I was going,” I admitted, “I was afraid to take my eyes off the road.”






The Monkey

A man walks into a bar and orders a beer. He takes his first sip and sets it down. While he is looking around the bar, a monkey swings down and steals the pint of beer from him before he is able to stop the monkey.The man asks the barman who owns the monkey. The barman replies the piano player. The man walks over to the piano player and says “Do you know your monkey stole my beer.” The pianist replies “No, but if you hum it, I‘ll play it.”



It‘s a good thing we didn‘t catch any more
Larry and Harry drove 500 miles to go fishing. They paid a huge sum to rent a cabin, a similar about to rent a boat. They fished for three days and caught only one fish between them.On the way home, Harry fiddled with(摆弄,玩弄) a calculator while Larry drove. After an hour, Harry said, Do you realize that this one fish we caught cost us almost $2,000?Wow! Larry said, It‘s a good thing we didn‘t catch any more.




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